The Story

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Ascension Address, Angry Grasshopper, 4.4.06

Hearty greetings to you, my brothers! We end the month of November in the Year of Our Lord, 1419. My fellow Benedictines send me message (though doubtlessly you have already heard) that the Anti Pope Joannes the Twenty-Third has died, and may we have no such difficulties during the papacy of Martinus the Fifth.

Here at Badia a Passignano we have just finished the harvest of olives, and the servants are making the necessary preparations for winter. Our harvest was a good one this year, and with luck our surplus will fetch us a good price at the market, though the market in Florence has no shortage of olives.

The political situation in Florence is as interesting as it has ever been, and I am glad that our Monastery of St. Passignano is located on the outskirts of the city. The Albizzi family still runs the city, but the upstart Medici clan is a powerful force in the market, and they seem to have changed the balance of power. Such temporal affairs of money and power need naturally not concern you, my brothers--our Rule forbids private ownership, for the good of our souls.

As we have started the month of November, I remind everyone that we shall keep the Night Office until Easter--that we shall all meet in the church at the 8th hour of night for Matins. However all monks are to return directly to their respective communal quarters afterwards, and no brother is to wander the grounds otherwise during the night for any purposes.

Funeral mass will be held tomorrow for our brother Alessandro of Pisa. The peasants who witnessed the accident said that Alessandro stumbled and fell before a cart and so met his end. Our assistant librarian Matteo of Florence will assume his duties and take the role of librarian. I have not decided whom to appoint the position of his assistant. Again, remember that it forbidden for all brothers to enter the library, so if any have need of a text for your work, search out the Codex in the Scriptorium and make a request to Matteo, who should be in the Scriptorium if not at offices or labor about the Abbey.

Yours, Abba,

Stefano of Florence

Day One: Tantus labor non sit cassus..., Angry Grasshopper, 4.5.06

The funerary ritual for Alessandro of Pisa is lengthy and elaborate, like most of the rituals at Badia a Passignano. The ceremony lasts for three hours, and like all of the offices and functions at the Monastery, is chanted by all of the monks. Brother Alessandro was a bit of strange fellow, with his unusual habits and tendencies to disappear unexpectedly if not at the center of attention. He was close to some of the brothers, but his demeanor tended to be slightly off-putting.

“...ab auditione mala non timebit.”

Alessandro had been the librarian for the last thirteen years. Speculation and rumor (mostly out of earshot of the abbot) have been passed about both regarding the unusual circumstances of his death, as well as the competency of Matteo of Pisa to handle the position, who was only appointed assistant last year.

“... Et gratia tua illis succurrente mereantur evadere judicium ultionis.”

As the rites are concluded, some of the more astute notice that Matteo is no longer in the chapel, having slipped out at some time during the ceremony. The abbot, who usually tends to lecture after these sort of things, leaves the chapel quickly, instructing some of the peasants and brothers to take the body out to the graveyard. As he steps quickly from the chapel, a folded piece of paper drops from the inside of his robe, which one of the brothers pockets in a nonchalant fashion.

“Per sepulcra regionum, coget omnes ante solium...”

Abbot's orders, Angry Grasshopper, 4.5.06

In order to demonstrate humility, I ask all new Monks and all idle Monks upon un-idling to take a Vow of Silence.

Yours, Abba,

Stefano of Florence.

TheSmokingMan has arrived, TheSmokingMan, 4.6.06

In the middle of a quiet, moonless night, a dark carriage pulled by two black horses silently pulls up to the Monastery of the Angry Grasshopper. A man emerges, dressed in a dark cloak, a pipe in his mouth, and heads straight for the gate. The carriage disappears into the night, as soundlessly as it arrived. The man hands the monastery guard some papers - the words “TheSmokingMan, arrival as per Law 1.2” can be made out on the first page. The guard starts to say something, ask something, but TheSmokingMan is already heading to the main monastery building. The second page in the pile of papers starts telling a long story about how TheSmokingMan repented, realized the folly of his ways and decided that a lifetime in God’s service as a Monk is just what he needs. Somehow, the guard doesn’t quite beleive this…

Day Two, Angry Grasshopper, 4.8.06

The funeral mass for Alessandro is finished, and the Abbey begins to move into its normal routine. The Monks chant the offices at the proper hours, the necessary labor is pooled and divided between the brothers, and the air of calm industry begins to settle again on the Abbey. The new Monk, as well as a few others, have taken vows of silence to demonstrate their discipline and humility.

The Abbot Stefano is often seen consulting with the new Librarian, Matteo. At Terce and Sext, after the Monks finished chanting their offices and had begun to leave for their duties, the Abbot was seen (by those who keep an eye for such things) handing a bundle of books and papers to Matteo. The Abbot seems to be in unusually good spirits, although no reasons why this should be so are apparent from his behavior. Matteo seems to be somewhat less confident than the brothers would have expected--perhaps the duties of a new station weight heavily on his mind.

A brother from a different order has appeared at the gates of the Monastery, just after sunrise as the Monks were chanting Lauds. The Abbot assigns him a room--15i. If the Porter will take this Unknown Brother (Tourist) to his quarters within the next two days, this would be superb.

Provided that these Monks keep in good standing with God (as well as staying active in the game), Plorkyeran is the new Assistant Librarian, Purplebeard is the new Porter, and Rodney is the new Cellarer.

Day Three, Angry Grasshopper, 4.10.06

A heavy rain has started to fall on the Abbey, although no storm was apparent on the horizons during the last few days.

The visiting brother is one Ugolino of Pisa. Having been escorted to his quarters and instructed to wait there until formally greeted by the abbot, Ugolino was observed to wander about the Abbey while the brothers were beginning their labors. (The assistant librarian noticed the new brother poking through the anteroom of the library, whereupon he gave the standard notice about the brothers and the collection.)

Word is received today that a prominent son of the Albizzi family was murdered in the streets of Florence--he was set upon by unidentified assassins as he left one of the mercantile districts of Florence at an unusual morning hour.

During communal dinner, the abbot is overheard mentioning something to Matteo about a deal of missing books, as well as a section of leaves torn from the Codex in the library antechamber. Although these words were not spoken loudly, word circulates through the monastery grapevine, as such a thing is strange enough even in such interesting times as these.

It's all very "hush-hush", Hix, 4.12.06

So I was trapped in a wall of nothingness for a while, which gave me a lot of time to think. When I finally got out, I wandered into the chapel and saw the Abbot kneeling before the altar. He stood up to greet me as I approached, so I engaged him in some conversation for a few short minutes. After offering up a quick prayer myself, I left the way I came, this time passing up the mysterious wall from which I had exited.

Day Four, Angry Grasshopper, 4.12.06

Murder most foul!

The body of Ugolino of Pisa is found in the common quarters after the monks return from their offices at Terce. A close inspection reveals that he suffered a blow to the head from behind, and a small pool of blood is found at a distance from the corpse.

Found in the hands of the deceased brother are a book and key of unknown origin, which are quickly confiscated by the abbot after word is sent out through the Abbey.

An Herbalist Ego, Elias IX, 4.12.06

I ban everyone else from entering the Infirmary before I arrive, because I have a stash of herbage that I need to secure. I’ll share with anyone as long that promises not to tell the Abbot of my “merchant venture”, as I’m pretty sure it’s illegal based on my monastic vows.

Day Five, Angry Grasshopper, 4.15.06

The entire monastery vibrates with tension and hysteria--the idea that one of the monks could kill a brother for no apparent reason is such an entirely alien notion. Preparations are being made for the funeral mass of Ugolino, a messenger has been dispatched to Pisa to inform his abbot of his untimely demise, and all of the monks exhibit some nervousness.

At the hours of None, a sergeant of the guard and two of his investigators show up at the abbey, demanding to speak with the abbot. Create three tourists (Sergeant, and two Guardsmen). If the Porter would take them to whichever Location the Abbot has within two days, that would be excellent.

The Night Before

As Brother Bucky approaches the Graveyard Chapel, it seems as if e can make out some light cast from inside of the Chapel. Evidently two monks, dressed in black robes with the hoods pulled over their heads, are standing before the altar, which has some strangely colored candles burning and unusual incense. As e enters the Graveyard Chapel, the two monks turn to face him. One of them laughs maniacally and sweeps a brazier and several other small objects off of the altar. The sound of breaking glass and liquids are heard. Both Monks rush to the exit of the Chapel, and having extinguished the lights, it is not clear who these people are.

As Bucky moves up to the altar, he finds a brazier on the floor, a censer (still burning) containing a heady incense which e does not place, and a pile of broken glass on top of a puddle of some viscous clear fluid.

Day Six, Angry Grasshopper, 4.21.06

The general air of the monastery at Passignano is hushed--a storm front has broken over the hills. The arrival of the sergeant of the guard has done nothing to decrease the tense feeling that the discovery of murder has brought about. The abbot had announced the morning after his arrival that the sergeant was to have access to all of the grounds (except the library, of course) and freedom to question any of the brothers as his discretion dictates. Throughout the day the men of the guard have wandered the grounds in a seemingly random fashion and taken the monks and servants aside for questioning.

The Feast of Saint Ignotus, Bucky, 5.5.06

Today being the Feast of Saint Ignotus, The Abbot led a special chanting session (+1 to everyone’s Integrity). Then, all the Monks congregated at the Banquet Hall at A-16C. Most of the monks, who are used to plain, meager rations, stuffed their faces in a very un-monkly manner (+8 to everyone’s Moves, -1 to everyone’s Integrity). The principal topics of conversation were the installation of the new bronze bell in the entryway, the strange black-robed monks last seen to the north of the abbey and the conspicuous absence of Elias IX, whom nobody has seen since Monday morning.

After the feast, everyone went back to their previous positions.

Shades of Redwall, Anonymous, 5.9.06

Attention Monks! There has been an unfortunate accident in the Entrance Hall. At about midnight last night, our new Bell’s rope snapped, dropping the bell onto the Monks gathered below. Several Monks have been severely injured and may even be dead. Each monk in an Entrance Hall location must roll DICE10 immediately and reduce eir fitness and temporary fitness by that amount. All injured monks should report to the Infirmary immediately.

Affected Monks are Smith, Rodney and Purplebeard.

Day Seven, Angry Grasshopper, 5.9.06

There is a great clash and clangor as the bell at the monastery gate comes crashing down. A cry goes out, and the brothers of the monastery rush to the entrance to see if anyone was injured. The sergeant of the guards eventually makes his way to the front of the monastery, and begins to inspect the great bell. Shaking his head, he rises, and brings to the attention of all the thick rope, which was cut cleanly through.

At dinner that evening, the Abbot mentions that the accident was in fact intentional, and malicious, and warns of stern secular punishments, (not to mention hellfire and brimstone) when this evil brother is caught and brought to justice.

Day Eight, Angry Grasshopper, 5.17.06

The storm that has been brewing for the past several days breaks, soaking the earth with a fantastic quantity of water. All Monks who are outside of the Monestary seek shelter from the rain and lightning, and return to the main building.

The Plague part 1, Bucky, 5.19.06

Having spent all night trimming the trees in the rain, Bucky returns to the main building. E appears to have a cold. However, in the next few days, the Monks would find out this was no mere cold...

The Plague part 2, No Author, 5.21.06

The plague rages on and more Monks get sick, while those already sick grow worse.

Day Nine, Angry Grasshopper, 5.29.06

The storm over the Abbey has dispersed, and a little bit of the gloom has lifted. At the hour of Terce, the Porter can see a figure approaching the abbey along the road through the vineyard across the hills. An itinerant Fransiscan, Zorenathres, has come to pay a visit to the Badia. After making suitable arrangements, the Abbot Stefano introduces the new Monk over dinner.

“My Brothers, welcome Zorenathres of Sicily to our company. Zorenathres, I remind you (if no one else has whispered it to you) that we are in the presence of one who cares nothing for the laws, divine or secular, so please be wary. I am sure that the guards from Pisa will wish to question you at your leisure.”

“Our servants have repaired the monastery bell. I am willing to absolve the sins of whichever of our brothers cut the rope, if only he will come and confess it to me.”

“Brother TAE is the new Assistant Librarian, may his actions increase our knowledge. Hix becomes the Lector. May the both of you keep us on the path of righteousness, and not stray in these dark times”.

Day Ten, Angry Grasshopper, 6.4.06

The air around the Monastery is heavy with an usual charge, as if a thunderstorm were on the horizon, although the sky is clear for a cold winter day. Everyone feels agitated and restless. Petty fights erupt among the brothers, and a feeling of irrational anger is almost tangible.

Two new Monks have arrived at the Monastery, leading a mule laden with bulging saddlebags. At the request of the Abbot, the Bishop Vincenzo of Siena has detached some of the monks from his see and sent them to Badia a Passignano with a shipment of books.

During the course of the day, some of the brothers notice unusual behavior from Alonzo, one of the guards from the city proper. Having been stationed at the front gate for some time, he seems to have taken to harassing the bellringers as they come, attempting to send them off as they ring the bells to announce the time for prayer. This unusual activity seems to have landed him in trouble with his sergeant, who was overheard complaining about the superstitious nature of his men.

The community atmosphere at dinner is a little less cooperative than usual. Quite unusually, as the wine is being served, one of the brothers came from the kitchen and began to pour Brother Bucky a goblet of wine, but the monk adjacent jostled him with great force, causing the wine to spill and the skin to empty on the floor. The Abbot is displeased by this show of clumsiness, but not enough so to break the Benedictine rule of silence at mealtime.

The Monastery is much warmer at night than it should be at this time of winter, and some brothers claim on rising to have heard voices and footsteps in the night.

Into the closet..., Hix, 6.5.06

Hmm.... I need to find one. I’m pretty sure I saw one leaning against the wall in the closet over there. I’ll just slip in while no one is looking, and....

In which things happen, Angry Grasshopper, 6.5.06

Due to a secret rule, all Monks lose three points of integrity.

Please recall that Story Posts by anyone other than me must be approved *ahem*--digging tunnels via Story Post without approval is not a legal play. The Map is edited.

A new Guest arrives--a Devil’s Advocate, named Philipo. Goal: to reach the Infirmary. I’ve noticed that Brother Rodney has been standing in the same place in the Entrance Hall for the last 9 (Story) days! I feel that he must be unwell, and so the duties of Cellarer fall on his assistant, Iron Man.

Iron Man, Iron Man, 6.6.06

I must say, this is a place most odd.

I do not think the other monks particularly like each other. This new monastery is tense, on edge in a way that reminds of the mood when Brother Mayfield was discovered to have hoarded supplies. I have spent much time thinking during my recent Vow of Silence (given to me the very day I arrived. while not peculiar in itself, as contemplation on new situations is best done in solitude, it unnerves me when compared to the other goings-on), and have decided to learn as much as I can about this new place before settling in. I can only hope that my duties as Cellarer allow me enough opportunity to look around, and I hope that the Son of God our Lord smiles upon me as I make my way in this world. I shall make my way to the Cellar, and will see what I can discover there.

-From the Diary of Eugene Matthew, the Man of Irons

Nontriumphant Return, Greth, 6.7.06

The main doors to the Monestary open as Greth returns from a two year pilgrimage to the Holy Lands. Muttering to himself something about how the monestary has changed, he begins to seek the Abbot to share his arrival.

Alcazar, Alcazar, 6.7.06

It’s a bright, cloudless day as the young monk Alcazar walks through the monastery gates for the very first time. Grinning with the joy of the young, head full of brightness and faith, Alcazar cheerfully attempts to find somebody who can lead him to the Abbot of the Monastery.

He begins humming a tune he heard from a friendly bard on the trip, and sets about his task.

A short vignette in which persons vanish into the night, Angry Grasshopper, 6.7.06

It’s Midnight. Much as Devils and their Advocates are wont to do, Philipo seems to have vanished entirely from the Monastery grounds. On his return he is found in the presence of Elias IX discussing various moral philosophies, such as divine command theory and deontological reasoning, and the merits and demerits of cheating one’s fellow men.

A Unique Description String, I Hope., Elias IX, 6.8.06

Elias IX was frolicking on the monastery grounds, off to pick some delicious (and perhaps not-so-delicious) herbs near the infirmary. First e arrived at one herb, examined it, and said, “With my Botany skill, I see that this is garlic, so let it be so.”

And it was so.

E then romped over to the nearest herb, because e loves the plants and animals of the world; they are so cute! E then knelt at the next herb, caressed it gently, with the love a mother shows to her youngest child, but not to her oldest bastard son whom she hates, isn’t that sad? E then cupped the herb in eir hands, examined it, and said, “With my Botany skill, I see that this is garlic, so let it be so.”

And it was so.

But e got slightly ticked off, since e already had some garlic, and both eir hands, but especially eir breath, smelled terrible, so e was slightly antagonized, since though e loves the flora and fauna of the monastery the most, e also treasures the value of having a good-smelling breath. E was very saddened, so e laid down for a rest in the grass, because that feels really good. The sun was shining on em, allowing vitamin D to be made in eir body, but all e felt was a nice warmth from the sunny, happy sky.

E felt a fly buzzing around eir left ear. It annoyed em, not as much as eir younger brother did when e was still living at home, but it was still very annoying. Suddenly he heard a tongue whip out and catch the fly. E turned eir head to the left, and saw a frog! What a joy that was! Elias IX was elated to see a frog, since eir love of animals is only surpassed by eir love of plants!

With eir excellent Monk reflexes, e grabbed the frog before the frog knew it was grabbed, which indeed takes excellent Monk reflexes. E examined it, and said, “Because I am not stupid, I see that this is a frog, so let it be so.”

And it was so.

E then said, “I shall make this frog my pet, to take wherever I go, and it shall be named Jesus, after a very cool guy.”

“Ribbit,” croaked the frog.

Uh oh., Anonymous, 6.8.06

An demon was invoked.

Just part of the day-to-day happenings in a monastery.

Good night, all.

Day Twelve, Angry Grasshopper, 6.9.06

A bevy of new monks arrive at the Monastery, on a pilgrimage from another church in Southern Italy. The new brothers are assigned quarters by the Abbot, and work continues about the Monastery grounds much as usual. One of the newly arrived is a brother Fransiscan, wandering abroad on a personal spiritual quest.

The general air at the Abbey has taken a turn for the worse. Several of the brothers are reprimanded by the Abbot for their antisocial behavior--several quarrels break out in the morning in the public quarters. It feels as if something in the air is not quite right, or natural, and in private stories are whispered of diabolic nightmares.

Several texts for study are distributed amongst the new brothers. The Cellarer notices the absence of one of the communal Shovels, which is of moderate interest, especially since e is in charge of the Monastery goods.

Day Twelve, the evening, Angry Grasshopper, 6.10.06

A great snowstorm falls upon Pisa. The Monks all return to the Abbey to take shelter from the cold.

Please don't tell anyone..., Purplebeard, 6.10.06

I’m sure some of you have noticed Purplebeard hurriedly going back and forth from the monastery to a certain place at map C, and some of you might have even spotted em concealing sharp objects and strange substances under eir oh so monkly robe recently. Today, e headed for eir favourite spot again after the daily chant concealing yet another rather unmonkly item under eir robe, a blunt wooden object this time. E seems to be in an awfully good mood today, too. Must be the snow.