The Fourth Dynasty of Cuddlebeam

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5 November 2019 – 9 December 2019

Ascension Address

Do not answer to the whispers in the mist:

Spain, with Cuddles de la Beam at its head, leads the world into a bright, sustainable future via a new energy reactor technology based on three newly discovered exotic elements. But this is a story of its past, a cursed, forgotten tale of swords, flintlock guns, and horrible, horrible, horrible secrets f̡r̛oe̷m b͉͙̙̙̞͝ei̱͍͎͘y̭̲ó̷͖̦̞̼̜̖̖͓͉͠a̶̴̛̪̤̮̻̼͈͔̳͇n̯͎͖̖̮̺͚͟͝͝͝d̡̪̰̖͍͈͓̲͚͙͚̱̖̕͟͝ͅj҉̢̺̦̳͖͈̹̫̙̫͕͍̻̤̻͕̰͎͇͘͢ͅs҉͇̪̘͘͞͝͝h͝͏̡̣̻͉̼̼͔̗̭͚͇̯̠̦͎̤s҉̢̘̪͍̻͕̰̞̩̤͓̲̟͉̠h̸̛̬̙͇̖̗̱͉͠

…. ... .. .

The Cathedral of the town of Jerez holds the last relic, the last remains of a messiah from time immemorial. It is the one last lock that is holding shut a horrible gate to… an unspeakable outside. And with its prison so weakened, that beyond starting to seep through, cursing everything in its wake, whimpering, roaring, trying to finally break free after ages of imprisonment.

Thankfully, a group of brave adventurers are here to try to bring and end to this, and solve it once and forever. But they will discover that their greatest obstacle towards reaching the grand truth, the grand solution, is themselves.

Remove “(abbreviated EM)”, “(abbreviated UNSG)”,

Change “EM” and “Energy Minister” to “Adventurer”. Change “UNSG” and “UN Secretary-General” to “Priest”.

Let’s rock.


The following players were active at the start of the Dynasty:

3Balance, Cuddlebeam, The Duke of Waltham, Farsight, Kevan*, pokes*, TyGuy6

The following players were active at the end of the Dynasty:

card*, Cuddlebeam, The Duke of Waltham, Kevan*, NoOneImportant, TyGuy6

Final Ruleset

Ruleset 172



Posts of Interest

  • The retiring of the GNDT happened with no hiccups, data is tracked elsewhere, on wikipage(s) embedded in the sidebar. May allow for different range of data to be tracked there.
  • Admins who have not logged into the blog within the past 730 days (~2 years) got their Admin status removed. thanks Kevan for being willing enough to do that, at ~52 accounts it probably took at least an hour.
  • The base mechanic of having one player be a monster that rotates to another Adventurer until everyone has been one once and the dynasty ends.
  • Iteration, like a boss introduced battle posts and merit which became this dynasty's score and condition for achieving victory.
  • Battle Formation introduced the basic attacks and a turn based battle system, done through comments on battle posts.
  • Customization, like a boss added boons, which adventurers could take exactly 5 of that each did something unique and usually did better when taking multiple of the same kind
  • They ͚̯̦̮̲c̶̫̦̬̻̮̜͖ọm̲̗̮̜̱e͍, like a boss introduce the equivalent of boons for monsters, which made each monster different
  • Holy Fire introduced the Fire action for Adventurers. It was later calculated to have an average output of 25.5, far above any other move that a single Adventurer can do. It did have the side affect of doing an average of 12.75 damage to allies.
  • Deadpool, like a boss made it impossible for one adventurer to pass the mantle of victory to another one. this is to curb people helping each other for a percentage chance of heading the next dynasty which has happened in the previous 5 dynasties.
  • Black Massacre made the Monster gain the maximum amount of Havoc if all Adventurers are unconscious, even if they hadn't gained that much Havoc beforehand.
  • Thirty Pieces of Silver let someone attempt to guess who the traitor is by spending 50 Merit. The traitor gains 50*Quorum Merit if nobody guessed them.

Boss Battles


Battle: First Blood


Rotting Presence x 5

Using a loophole, Kevan started the battle with a Retreat, which made him unable to be the target of Battle Actions, as his Rotting Presence netted him some Havoc. card Introduced himself as an Exorcist x 5, and began their Banish. Due to some clunky wording defining actions, card's initial banish was deemed to be illegal and instead started with Fire.

The Duke of Waltham

Healer Turned Hostile


Bulk, 3 Hidden Monstrosities

Using a loophole, TyGuy6 made The Duke of Waltham skip the first action they should have gotten, using The Duke of Waltham's recently passed proposal.


The Wildcard


Bulk x 3, Hidden x 1

This battle went on for a very long time, with card consistently clawing The Duke of Waltham and then The Duke of Waltham healing themselves each round. Because of how the Vanguard system worked, the Humans were able to give someone 2 actions a round every other round and this almost allowed The Duke of Waltham to never become Unconscious. The battle ended a bit after card used the Hidden monstrosity of Reverse Mother to permanently make The Duke of Waltham unconscious and by that time they were at too low health to survive much longer.


Final Hurdle

Bulk x 1, Rotting Presence x 3

This battle was shorter than the previous one. Because of the large amount of Rotting Presence monstrosities, the Humans had to finish this monster off within 3 moves: at that point TyGuy6 would have enough Havoc to put him in a solid lead. He did not accomplish this because of the variance of the Fire move.


After the final Battle, Kevan and TyGuy were tied on 2352 Merit, with card on 2106, the Duke of Waltham on 1254 and NoOneImportant on 360. When the Catechism bonus was added, TyGuy won with 2502 to Kevan's 2402.


Some post-game commentary is at

I though it was a fun departure from the previous dynasties where it is all too easy to ask a friend to help you win. Card (talk) 21:57, 12 December 2019 (UTC)

Dynastic Histories

Round One - Myke I - Lyndse I - Myke II - Kevan I - Anthony I - Est I - Kevan II - Damanor I - Kevan III - Cayvie I - Josh I - Keitalia I - SatyrEyes I - Metadynasty I - Cayvie II - Brendan I - Kevan IV - Knightking I - Chronos Phaenon I - TrumanCapote I - Knightking II - Quazie I - Simon I - AngryGrasshopper I - Rodney I - Aaron I - Josh II - Metadynasty II - Chronos Phaenon II - Excalabur I - Excalabur II - 75th Trombone I - Elias IX I - Metadynasty III - Angry Grasshopper II - Hix I - Thelonious I - Elias IX II - Rodney II - Clucky I - Doremi I - Chronos Phaenon III - Amnistar I - Clucky II - Amnistar II - Bucky I - Clucky III - Josh III - Kevan V - Hix II - Spikebrennan I - Jack I - Purplebeard I - Rodlen I - Yoda I - Amnistar III - Darknight I - Bucky II - Yoda II - Metadynasty IV - Arthexis I - Amnistar IV - Devenger I - Ais523 I - Ienpw III I - Qwazukee I - Klisz I - Metadynasty V - Bucky III - Wakukee I - Kevan VI - Ais523 II - Josh IV - Purplebeard II - Ais523 III - Ienpw III II - Klisz II - Lilomar I - Coppro I - Ais523 IV - Kevan VII - Brendan II - Alecto I - Josh V - Clucky IV - Purplebeard III - Kevan VIII - Ais523 V - Purplebeard IV - Yoda III - Bucky IV - Kevan IX - Bateleur I - Metadynasty VI - Coppro II - Ais523 VI - Cpt Koen I - Southpointingchariot I - Josh VI - Scshunt III - Quirck I - Clucky V - Bucky V - Kevan X - Josh VII - Kevan XI - Scshunt IV - RaichuKFM I - Larrytheturtle I - Skju I - Metadynasty VII - Purplebeard V - Spitemaster I - Josh VIII - RaichuKFM II - The Alien I - Benzene I - RaichuKFM III - Purplebeard VI - Kevan XII - Ayesdeeef I - Bucky VI - Kevan XIII - Josh IX - Mideg I - Kevan XIV - Brendan III - Kevan XV - Tantusar I - Josh X - Kevan XVI - Thrawn I - Brendan IV - Kevan XVII - Moonroof I - RaichuKFM IV - Larrytheturtle II - Brendan V - Kevan XVIII - Brendan VI - RaichuKFM V - Kevan XIX - Brendan VII - Kevan XX - Viv I - Pokes I - Sphinx I - Madrid I - Pokes II - Madrid II - Metadynasty VIII - Axemabaro I - Diabecko I - Kevan XXI - Diabecko & Card I - Kevan XXII - Derrick I - Card I - Madrid III - Card II - Kevan XXIII - Pokes III - Kevan XXIV - Trigon I - Derrick II - Kevan XXV - Derrick III - Farsight I - TyGuy6 I - Pokes IV - Madrid IV - TyGuy6 II - Kevan XXVI - The Duke of Waltham I - Josh XI - Clucky VI - Naught I - Metadynasty IX - Kevan XXVII - Josh XII - Clucky VII - Josh XIII - Bucky VII - Josh XIV - Kevan XXVIII - Lemonfanta I - Clucky VIII - Josh XV - Misty I - ais523 VII - Josh XVI - Kevan XXIX - Trapdoorspyder I - Metadynasty X - Brendan VIII - Brendan IX - Zack I - Misty II - Josh XVII - MadisonSilver I - Josh XVIII - Kevan XXX - Lendunistus I - Josh XIX - SingularByte I - Trapdoorspyder II - Bucky XIII - JonathanDark I - Trapdoorspyder III - Habanero I - JonathanDark II - Misty III - Metadynasty XI - Josh XX - Lemon II - Kevan XXXI - Josh XXI - Clucky IX - Vovix I - JonathanDark III - Zack II - JonathanDark IV - Josh XXII - Kevan XXXII - JonathanDark V